You’re Foxed Now

February 2, 2005

This would be even funnier if it wasn’t so frustratingly accurate:

New on DVD: Whatever show you didn’t watch last year

“I’m not worried because I’ve finally figured out Fox’s cunning plan: obviously they want people to stop watching television altogether. It’s a radical method of beating the other networks once and for all, in a we’ll-all-go-down-together sort of way, but it’s the only possible answer.

Why else would they keep moving shows around faster than the eye can see? “Family Guy,” “Wanda at Large,” “The O.C.” and “Tru Calling” are recent ping-pongees but nothing matches “Greg the Bunny,” which debuted on a Wednesday, moved to Sunday, then back to Wednesday for a while, then to Friday, then finally back to Sunday. It was cancelled after exhausted viewers collapsed, TV Guides still in hand.

Why continue to consign promising shows to the dreaded Friday Night Death Slot, the pit of programming despair that’s been sucking down and grinding up shows ever since the original “Star Trek”? “Wanda at Large,” “Boston Public,” “John Doe,” “Millennium,” “Playing it Straight,” “The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr.” and “Wonderfalls” all fell under the Friday Night Sentence of Summary Execution.”

The rest of it is also hysterical and too near the mark.  I’d quote it all, but why don’t you go read it instead?

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